I was talking to a friend one day about something I planned to do. Actually, I was worrying about how one particular person might react to what I intended to do.
“What if he doesn’t handle it very well?” I asked.
“Then,” my friend replied, “you’re going to have to handle it well.”
What ifs can make us crazy. They put control over our life in someone else’s hands. What ifs are a sign that we have reverted to thinking that people have to react in a particular way for us to continue on our course.
What ifs are also a clue that we may be wondering whether we can trust ourselves and our Higher Power to do what’s best for us. These are shreds of codependent ways of thinking, feeling, and behaving, and they signal fear.
The reactions, feelings, likes or dislikes of others don’t have to control our behaviors, feelings, and direction. We don’t need to control how others react to our choices. We can trust ourselves, with help from a Higher Power, to handle any outcome – even the most uncomfortable. And, my friend, we can trust ourselves to handle it well.
Today, I will not worry about other people’s reactions or events outside of my control. Instead, I will focus on my reactions. I will handle my life well today and trust that, tomorrow, I can do the same.
From the book:
The Language of Letting Go © 1990 by Hazelden Foundation
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