WALK IN DRY PLACES #essentialsofrecovery

DON’T FEED THE HABIT

Enhancing Sobriety

We quickly learn that it’s wrong to do anything that “feeds” a drinking habit. A recovering person would be foolish, for example, to spend time in a drinking environment simply to “be with friends.”

It’s constructive to take that same approach to-ward other problems we’d like to get out of our lives. If gossip has been my problem, for example, I should not feed it by listening to gossip or even by reading gossipy articles and books. If I have ac-cumulated debts through overspending, I should cut off window shopping and other practices that may bring on more unnecessary debt. And if I want to rid my life of self-pity, I should not spend a single moment brooding over the bad breaks I have had in the past.

Bad habits have a life of their own. They are somewhat like rodents that have found their way into the house and have become star boarders. One way to control rodents is to eliminate their food supply. That same principle applies to bad habits we want to eliminate from our own lives.

I’ll make a strong effort to cut off any line of thinking that feeds my bad habits, whatever they are. This might include avoiding practices that others see as harmless and trivial. However, nothing is harmless or trivial if it has become destructive in my life.

© 1996 by Hazelden Foundation 

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DAILY ZEN #essentialsofrecovery

As long as you are subject
To a life bound by force of habit,
You are not free from the
Burden of the body.

- Kuei-Shan (771-854)

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day #essentialsofrec #Habits

A.A. Thought For The Day

In following the A.A. program with its twelve steps, we have the advantage of a better understanding of our problems. Day after day our sobriety results in the formation of new habits, normal habits. As each twenty-four-hour period ends, we find that the business of staying sober is a much less trying and fearsome ordeal than it seemed in the beginning. Do I find it easier as I go along?

Meditation For The Day

Learn daily the lesson of trust and calm in the midst of the storms of life. Whatever of sorrow or difficulty the day may bring, God’s command to you is the same. Be grateful, humble, calm, and loving to all people. Leave each soul the better for having met you or heard you. For all kinds of people, this should be your attitude: a loving desire to help and an infectious spirit of calmness and trust in God.  You have the answer to loneliness and fear, which is calm faith in the goodness and purpose in the universe.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may be calm in the midst of storms. I pray that I may pass on this calmness to others who are lonely and full of fear. 

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A WOMAN’S SPIRIT #essentialsofrec #Habits #Women #Recovery

Practiced consistently, new habits become who I am.

~ Lin Andrukat 

We sometimes have trouble defining ourselves. Anyone who spends much time in our presence, however, can define us pretty accurately. Our habits tell our “story” quite readily.

Many of our behaviors embarrass us, yet we repeat them. But changing them takes more than wishing they’d disappear. It takes a decision not to repeat them and the thoughtfulness to find a replacement for them. We return to old behaviors more out of laziness than intent.

Those of us in a Twelve Step program have the tools to make this shift in our behavior easier. Doing a Fourth Step to look at the past, and frequent Tenth Steps to stay on top of today, gives us the insight to define who we are and who we’d rather be. Changing who we are isn’t that difficult if we have the desire.

Any current behavior used to be “new.” It became a habit only with continuous use. I can decide to begin a new behavior today.

© 1994 by Hazelden Foundation

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DAILY ZEN #essentialsofrecovery

Bad Habits

In the root and stem of your own psyche there is an accumulation of bad habits, If you cannot see through them and act independently of them, you will unavoidably get bogged down along the way.

Zen Master Yuansou

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One Day At A Time #essentialsofrecovery

HABITS


”A habit cannot be tossed out the window; it must be coaxed down the stairs a step at a time.”

–Mark Twain

How grateful I was when I read that quote – even though I had to translate it a bit. It has always been difficult for me to start good habits. I’ve heard all kinds of things about that – that it takes 21 days, 40 days, or an x-number of weeks to start a habit. It always made me feel bad and different because I swear for me, it probably takes at least two years. Until then I’d be biting my nails, knowing that even if I did practice good habits, they might disappear at any time. It was supposed to be so much faster, so much easier! A few weeks of eating healthy, and magically I would be cured! Well, that never happened.

Now I can look at good habits – like eating healthy, exercising, meditating, paying my bills on time – as tender, shy little animals that need a long time before they can be coaxed up the stairs of my life. They need patience, a lot of quiet time, and a willingness to be understood and studied. How do I feed, nurture and care for this habit?

I cannot do it alone. I do not have the patience, the willingness, nor the nurturing to do this by myself. I need the help of the fellowship and the help of my Higher Power. This help is freely given to me ~ all I need to do is accept it, and together we can make my habits more and more comfortable in the house of my life.

One day at a time…
With the help of my Higher Power and the program, I can patiently learn to practice healthy habits.

~ Isabella

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WALK IN DRY PLACES #essentialsofrecovery

ALCOHOLISM: DISEASE OR BAD HABIT?

Understanding My Problem

While AA has always considered alcoholism a disease, controversy still simmers over its definition. In the past, alcoholism has been considered a sin, a sickness, or just a very bad habit. More recently, there has been a suggestion that some “problem drinkers” might not be alcoholics at all and can very possibly bring their drinking under control.

This controversy will undoubtedly continue, but it is important that recovering people understand the nature of alcoholism. It is deadly, it is compulsive, and it is progressive. While there are occasional reports of alcoholics who claim to have become controlled drinkers, few of us have any firsthand evidence of such changes. Much more often, we hear the stories of alcoholics who try to drink again, only to find themselves headed down a rocky road.

It is not necessary that we define alcoholism perfectly or precisely. What’s more important is that we remember we’re powerless over alcohol and cannot safely pick up a drink. No definition will change that reality for an alcoholic who has had an unmanageable life.

I’m fortunate AA gave me an understanding of my problem that I can live with—one that will help me continue living. Others can worry about defining alcoholism. I’ll focus on staying sober myself.

© 1996 by Hazelden Foundation 

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day #essentialsofrecovery

A.A. Thought For The Day

There is such a thing as being too loyal to any one group.
Do I feel put out when another group starts and some members
of my group leave it and branch out into new territory? Or do
I send them out with my blessing? Do I visit that new offshoot
group and help it along? Or do I sulk in my own tent? A.A.
grows by the starting of new groups all the time. I must
realize that it’s a good thing for a large group to split up
into smaller ones, even it if means that the large group
–my own group–becomes smaller. Am I always ready to help
new groups?

Meditation For The Day

Pray–and keep praying until it brings peace and serenity and
a feeling of communion with One who is near and ready to help.
The thought of God is balm for our hates and fears. In praying
to God, we find healing for hurt feelings and resentments. In
thinking of God, doubts and fears leave us. Instead of those
doubts and fears, there will flow into our hearts such faith
and love as is beyond the power of material things to give, and
such peace as the world can neither give nor take away. And with
God, we can have the tolerance to live and let live.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may have true tolerance and understanding.
I pray that I may keep striving for these difficult things. 

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One Day At A Time #essentialsofrecovery

~ STEP SIX ~

The Spiritual lift, the nearness to our Creator that is experienced from humble invocation of His help, and our willingness to be freed from old willfull thoughts and habits are essential to successful attainment of these steps.
–The Little Red Book

I am a compulsive overeater. I eat three moderate meals each day without exception. In between, I have nothing except sugar-free gum, water, diet soda, and black coffee. Today I am working hard to allow my Higher Power to remove my imperfections. The focus is on the removal of blame, resentment, fear, and self-pity. I want to blame. I do resent. I have a lot of fear, but with surrender it is not paralyzing. I easily feel sorry for myself and cry about it. All of this threatens my abstinence, which is about sanity. The weight loss is an extra reward. The ability to approach responsibilities and feelings is the life force which I cannot take for granted.

When food was my higher power it was hell. I take my disease and recovery seriously. It’s choosing life over slow, torturous death. All my problems are the same, yet somehow they are livable. Continually asking for removal of my defects results in a decrease of anxiety. I believe fully that my Higher Power will remove my problems in a time and way which I have no control over, as long as I remain willing. Today I am completely willing. I am grateful to have been chosen for recovery.

One day at a time…
I can eat three weighed, measured and committed meals without exception. I enjoy my meals and feel satisfied by them.

~ Ellen ~ 

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Today’s Gift. #essentialsofrec

Happiness is a mental habit, a mental attitude, and if it is not learned and practiced in the present it is never experienced.

–Maxwell Maltz

If only I had a new bike, then I’d be happy. If only my family were more understanding, then I’d be happy. If only my hair were styled better. If only I had more friends. If only… Sometimes we begin to sound like a broken record when things go wrong, so certain that if the events and conditions of our lives were different, we’d be happy.
It’s an old and unfortunate habit that we look around outside ourselves for happiness. We can never be sure of it if we count on certain conditions to guarantee it. However, we can always be sure of happiness if we carry it with us wherever we go. The happiness habit can be developed, with practice, just as surely as good piano playing or accurate pitching. We can control our own thoughts. The decision to make them happy ones is ours to make.
Am I carrying my happiness within me right now? 

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Emmet Fox - Take a Vacation--from Yourself! #essentialsofrec #Recovery #Change

During the summer when vacations are in order, it is a good time to take a vacation from yourself. Of course, you cannot leave your body at home and go off somewhere, but nevertheless, you can change your mind and your habits of living so that for practical purposes you will be taking a vacation from yourself.

Here are a few simple suggestions:

1) Change your habits of thought. Be sure to eliminate all resentment, criticism, and condemnation of yourself as well as others, no matter how plausible the pretext for harboring them.

2) Change your habits of eating. Include some new articles of food that you have not been in the habit of eating--and drop some of the old ones.

3) Keep your prayers fresh, new, and simple. Get away from the usual phrases and affirmations.

4) Rearrange, if possible, your order of work at the office or shop. Resolve any old grievances.

5) Reorganize your recreation and leisure. Add some new pastime and eliminate some of the old ones. Try reading a different newspaper and get acquainted with other magazines than those to which you are accustomed.

6) Drop all cares and worries about politics, business and the foreign situation. You will be surprised to find that the world will manage to struggle on somehow.

Take a vacation from yourself--and you might like the change well enough to make it permanent.

Fox, Emmet (2010-09-07). Stake Your Claim: Exploring the Gold Mine Within (pp. 72-73). Harper Collins, Inc.. Kindle Edition.

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A WOMAN’S SPIRIT #essentialsofrec #Habit #happy Recovery

I always have two lists: things I’m happy about and things I’m not. It’s my choice which list I focus on.
~ Anne Arthur ~
Why do we all too eagerly see the glass as half- empty rather than as half-full? It need not be a habit that we are stuck with forever. All of us feel helpless at times to change our vision of life. Discouragement and self-pity become comfortable, and we fear that discarding them will leave us vulnerable.

Seeing the glass as half-empty is a sign that our attitude is holding us back. Unfortunately, a bad attitude is seductive. It’s as though we find pleasure, perverse though it may be, in feeling sorry for ourselves. Sometimes we even imagine staying in that place forever. It’s then that we need the warmth of loving friends, and it’s no accident that we are surrounded by them in this fellowship.

We may, at first, try to ignore those reaching toward us, but we will soon feel their presence. We can thank God for the inspiration to adjust our attitude.

If I reach out lovingly to someone else today, I will not need a nudge from my Higher Power to adjust my attitude.

© 1994 by Hazelden Foundation

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THE EYE OPENER #essentialsofrec #Recovery #Habits

 10
November

We are all subjects to the habit of imagining a lot of needs and desires that we would not actually want if we stopped and gave the matter some thought. List those needs sometime and then think them over carefully. A yacht would be mighty nice in the summer but it’s a pest in the winter. A fat bank account takes more thought and hard work to keep than it ever did to acquire. It is much nicer to just let your friends have these things and you be their guest.
Copyright  Hazelden 

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A DAY AT A TIME #essentialsofrec #Prayer #Habit

  9
November

Reflection for the Day

As time passes, daily communion with God is becoming as essential to me as breathing in and out. I don’t need a special place to pray, because God always hears my call. I don’t need special words with which to pray, because God already knows my thoughts and my needs. I have only to turn my attention to God, aware that His attention is always turned to me. Do I know that only good can come to me if I trust God completely?

Today I Pray

May my communion with God become a regular part of my life, as natural as a heartbeat. May I find, as I grow accustomed to the attitude of prayer, that it becomes less important to find a corner of a room, a bedside, a church pew, or even a special time of day, for prayer. May my thoughts turn to God automatically and often, whenever there is a lull in my day or a need for direction.

Today I Will Remember

Let prayer become a habit.

© 1989 by Hazelden Foundation

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  5
October 

HABITS


”A habit cannot be tossed out the window; it must be coaxed down the stairs a step at a time.”

–Mark Twain

How grateful I was when I read that quote – even though I had to translate it a bit. It has always been difficult for me to start good habits. I’ve heard all kinds of things about that – that it takes 21 days, 40 days, or an x-number of weeks to start a habit. It always made me feel bad and different because I swear for me, it probably takes at least two years. Until then I’d be biting my nails, knowing that even if I did practice good habits, they might disappear at any time. It was supposed to be so much faster, so much easier! A few weeks of eating healthy, and magically I would be cured! Well, that never happened.

Now I can look at good habits – like eating healthy, exercising, meditating, paying my bills on time – as tender, shy little animals that need a long time before they can be coaxed up the stairs of my life. They need patience, a lot of quiet time, and a willingness to be understood and studied. How do I feed, nurture and care for this habit?

I cannot do it alone. I do not have the patience, the willingness, nor the nurturing to do this by myself. I need the help of the fellowship and the help of my Higher Power. This help is freely given to me ~ all I need to do is accept it, and together we can make my habits more and more comfortable in the house of my life.

One day at a time…
With the help of my Higher Power and the program, I can patiently learn to practice healthy habits.

~ Isabella

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Today’s Gift from Hazelden #essentialsofrec #Recovery #habits

  9
September

Forming new habits

We form habits and then these habits begin to form us. For so long we had such self-destructive ways of being: We were self-centered, angry, and critical people, and so we behaved selfishly, angrily, and judgmentally in the world.

To stay clean and sober we must develop new habits, new patterns of living. We must give up old hangouts, old friends, old attitudes, and ideas. It seems this is the only way to form new habits – for example, kindness, love, and honesty – on which our program is based.

What habits do I want to develop?

Higher Power, Help me to form new habits to replace the old ones that nearly destroyed my life.

From the book:

Day by Day – Second Edition by Anonymous

Day by Day © 1974, 1998 by Hazelden Foundation

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The Eye Opener #essentialsofrec #Health #Recovery

 5
April

You can eat yourself to death as quickly as you can drink yourself to death. Working unreasonable overtime will bring on extreme fatigue that you may think “necessitates” a stimulant.

Too much zeal is fanaticism and Twelve Stepping without due regard to your own welfare can land you in trouble up to your neck.

Easy does it.

Copyright Hazelden Foundation

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Today's Gift #essentialsofrec #Recovery #Habits #Change

28
March
Changing destructive habits is what changes lives

People grow accustomed to habits even when they are self-destructive. We who have sought the help of Twelve Step programs were often caught in patterns of behavior that injured us or other people. We want help to change these habits or we wouldn’t be here now.

We learn at our first meeting that Twelve Step programs are both for the present day and for a lifetime. We are comforted and surprised by that. The comfort is in knowing help will always be available to us. The surprise is in having erroneously thought that we’d get “fixed” and not need the meetings forever.

It doesn’t take us long to realize the benefits of utilizing Twelve Step recovery in our daily lives. For years we repeated the same behaviors, expecting different outcomes, but that didn’t happen. Now we have a plan for living that includes Steps, slogans, friends, and support meetings – a host of new options for handling every detail of our journey. And we can see, even in a short time, that our lives are changing at last.

I can change my life if I have the willingness to use what the program is teaching me.

From the book:

A Life of My Own by Karen Casey

A Life of My Own by Karen Casey. © 1993 by Hazelden Foundation

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