“(Alcoholics) have one symptom in common: they cannot start drinking without developing the phenomenon of craving. This phenomenon …may be the manifestation of an allergy which differentiates these people, and sets them apart as a distinct entity. It has never been …permanently eradicated. The only relief we have to suggest is entire abstinence.”
– Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, “The Doctor’s Opinion,” p xxviii.
Today, I will not play the game of illusions that I may again be able to drink responsibly; the risk is too high, its costs potentially lethal. I will not try “just one” or “controlled” drinking with the myth or desperate thought that I can undo by returning to the thing that ravaged me physically, emotionally and spiritually – alcohol. For if the physician cited in the Big Book is accurate that we as problem drinkers have a craving for alcohol, any amount of it is paramount to a relapse from which I might not return. Today, I accept that I am an alcoholic, that I cannot play the potentially deadly game of by-passing that fact and, in so doing, I refuse to fuel the craving. Today, I have a choice: I will not drink. And our common journey continues.
Step by step. – Chris M.
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