As Bill Sees It May 24 2026

Victory in Defeat, p. 135

Convinced I never could belong, and vowing I’d never settle for any second-rate status, I felt I simply had to dominate in everything I chose to do: work or play. As this attractive formula for the good life began to succeed, according to my then specifications of success, I became deliriously happy.

But when an undertaking occasionally did fail, I was filled with resentment and depression that could be cured only by the next triumph. Very early, therefore, I came to value everything in terms of victory or defeat–“all or nothing.” The only satisfaction I knew was to win.

Only through utter defeat are we able to take our first steps toward liberation and strength. Our admissions of personal powerlessness finally turn out to be firm bedrock upon which happy and purposeful lives may be built.

1. Grapevine, January 1962
2. 12 & 12, p. 21

DAILY REFLECTIONS - - April 25 2026

ENTERING A NEW DIMENSION

In the late stages of our drinking the will to resist has fled. Yet when we admit complete defeat and when we become entirely ready to try A. A. principles, our obsession leaves us and we enter a new dimension—freedom under God as we understand Him.

~ AS BILL SEES IT, p. 283 ~
I am fortunate to be among the ones who have had this awesome transformation in my life. When I entered the doors of A.A., alone and desperate, I had been beaten into willingness to believe anything I heard. One of the things I heard was, “This could be your last hangover, or you can keep going round and round.” The man who said this obviously was a whole lot better off than 1.1 liked the idea of admitting defeat and I have been free ever since! My heart heard what my mind never could: “Being powerless over alcohol is no big deal.” I’m free and I’m grateful!

Copyright © 1990 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services Inc

AS BILL SEES IT #essentialsofrecovery

~ Page 49 ~

Out of Defeat . . . Strength

If we are planning to stop drinking, there must be no reservation of any kind, nor any lurking notion that someday we will be immune to alcohol.

<< << << >> >> >>

Such is the paradox of A.A. regeneration: strength arising out of complete defeat and weakness, the loss of one’s old life as a condition for finding a new one.

~ 1. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, P. 33 ~
~ 2. A.A. COMES OF AGE, P. 46 ~

© 1967 by Alcoholics Anonymous ® World Services, Inc

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A DAY AT A TIME #essentialsofrec #recovery #Assets

Reflection for the Day

Why don’t I spend part of today thinking about my assets, rather than my liabilities? Why not think about victories, instead of defeats—about the ways in which I am gentle and kind? It’s always been my tendency to fall into a sort of cynical self-hypnosis, putting derogatory labels on practically everything I’ve done, said, or felt. Just for today, I’ll spend a quiet half hour trying to gain a more positive perspective on my life. Do I have the courage to change the things I can?

Today I Pray

Through quietness and a reassessment of myself, may I develop a more positive attitude. If I am a child of God, created in God’s image, there must be goodness in me. I will think about that goodness, and the ways it manifests itself. I will stop putting myself down, even in my secret thoughts. I will respect what is God’s. I will respect myself.

Today I Will Remember

Self-respect is respect for God.

© 1989 by Hazelden Foundation

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AS BILL SEES IT #essentialsofrec #Recovery #BillW #Strength

~ Page 49 

Out of Defeat . . . Strength

If we are planning to stop drinking, there must be no reservation of any kind, nor any lurking notion that someday we will be immune to alcohol.

<< << << >> >> >>

Such is the paradox of A.A. regeneration: strength arising out of complete defeat and weakness, the loss of one’s old life as a condition for finding a new one.

~ 1. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, P. 33 ~
~ 2. A.A. COMES OF AGE, P. 46 ~

© 1967 by Alcoholics Anonymous ® World Services, Inc

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As Bill Sees It #essentialsofrecovery

Victory in Defeat, p. 135

Convinced I never could belong, and vowing I’d never settle for any
second-rate status, I felt I simply had to dominate in everything I
chose to do: work or play. As this attractive formula for the good
life began to succeed, according to my then specifications of success,
I became deliriously happy.

But when an undertaking occasionally did fail, I was filled with
resentment and depression that could be cured only by the next
triumph. Very early, therefore, I came to value everything in terms
of victory or defeat–“all or nothing.” The only satisfaction I knew
was to win.

<< << << >> >> >>

Only through utter defeat are we able to take our first steps toward
liberation and strength. Our admissions of personal powerlessness
finally turn out to be firm bedrock upon which happy and purposeful
lives may be built.

1. Grapevine, January 1962
2. 12 & 12, p. 21 

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As Bill Sees It

Victory in Defeat, p. 135

Convinced I never could belong, and vowing I’d never settle for any second-rate status, I felt I simply had to dominate in everything I chose to do: work or play. As this attractive formula for the good life began to succeed, according to my then specifications of success, I became deliriously happy.

But when an undertaking occasionally did fail, I was filled with resentment and depression that could be cured only by the next triumph. Very early, therefore, I came to value everything in terms of victory or defeat–“all or nothing.” The only satisfaction I knew was to win.

Only through utter defeat are we able to take our first steps toward liberation and strength. Our admissions of personal powerlessness finally turn out to be firm bedrock upon which happy and purposeful lives may be built.

1. Grapevine, January 1962
2. 12 & 12, p. 21

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Walk In Dry Places #essentialsofrecovery

A fatal Feature of alcoholism
Admitting defeat

Part of alcoholism’s deadliness lies in its peculiar tendency to blind the victim to the hopelessness of the situation. Time and again, AA members meet people who are in the final stages of their disease, yet are still clinging to the fallacy that things are not as bad as they seem. Indeed, many alcoholics who have engineered their own ruin still believe they are either victims of bad luck or of malevolent action by others.

Let’s remember, however, that others might not be so fortunate. We must not criticize them for not being able to accept the hopelessness of their condition. We should also look for our own blind spots about others problems in our lives.

I’ll remember today that only the 12 Step program arrested my fatal disease and keeps it at bay. I’ll feel kindly toward others who are having trouble admitting defeat; maybe this is the day it will happen for them.

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A DAY AT A TIME #essentialsofrecovery

Reflection for the Day

If we are determined to stop drinking or using other chemicals, there must be no reservations whatsoever, nor any lurking notion that our allergy of the body and obsession of the mind will someday reverse themselves. Our regeneration comes through the splendid paradox of the Twelve Steps: Strength arises from complete defeat, and the loss of one’s old life is a condition for finding a new one. Am I convinced that in powerlessness, power comes? Am I certain that by releasing my life and will I am released?

Today I Pray

May I know power through powerlessness, victory through surrender, triumph through defeat. May I learn to relinquish any trace of secret pride that I can “do it by myself.” Let my will be absorbed and steered by the omnipotent will of God.

Today I Will Remember

Let go and let God.

© 1989 by Hazelden Foundation 

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WALK IN DRY PLACES #essentialsofrecovery

A FATAL FEATURE OF ALCOHOLISM

Admitting defeat

Part of alcoholism’s deadliness lies in its peculiar tendency to blind the victim to the hopelessness of the situation. Time and again, AA members meet people who are in the final stages of their disease, yet are still clinging to the fallacy that things are not as bad as they seem. Indeed, many alcoholics who have engineered their own ruin still believe they are either victims of bad luck or of malevolent action by others.

Those of us who recover can be grateful that we were brought to understand that we were without hope until we found help in the program. This was our lifeline to a safe recovery.

Let’s remember, however, that others might not be so fortunate. We must not criticize them for not being able to accept the hopelessness of their condition. We should also look for our own blind spots about others problems in our lives.

I’ll remember today that only the Twelve Step program arrested my fatal disease and keeps it at bay. I’ll feel kindly toward others who are having trouble admitting defeat; maybe this is the day it will happen for them.

© 1996 by Hazelden Foundation 

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WALK IN DRY PLACES #essentialsofrec #Humility #Defeat

NO HUMILIATION IN HUMILITY

Self-Understanding

With few exceptions, every alcoholic eventually meets humiliation and defeat. This is especially painful in a world that places high value on winning and on having the approval and admiration of others. We feel diminished by these defeats. Nobody likes to be humbled, to be made to appear less than other people.

Yet these humiliations serve a constructive purpose if they lead us to seek humility. Truly humble people cannot really be humiliated, be-cause they no longer rely on the false supports of worldly praise and approval. We develop humility as we withdraw from a reliance on our own powers and personality and realize that we ourselves can do nothing; it is our Higher Power who does the work.

Still, there is a paradox in humility. The person who admits he or she can do nothing will, in the process, tap into powers that were never available in the previous state of mind. In truth, humility is never humiliation or weakness, though these may lead to it. Humility is really a road to the power that only God can give us.

I’ll watch myself today for the crazy things that set me up for humiliation. I won’t try to impress others or win their admiration today. I will see humility as a most worthy condition.

© 1996 by Hazelden Foundation

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KEEP IT SIMPLE #essentialsofrec #Recovery #Defeat #Surrender

What is defeat? . . . Nothing but the first step to something better.
~ Wendell Phillips 
A man walks into a meeting. He says, “I surrender. I can’t drink like other folks.” We smile and welcome him. We know that feeling. All of us in the program must admit defeat. Our illness is more powerful than we are. We begin recovery when we surrender.
Admitting defeat is our first step into a beautiful world. Like all first steps, it’s hard. But what a world we find ourselves in! A world where we count! A world where all are really equal!

This first step brings us into God’s world of care. We get love. We give love. We stay sober because daily we admit defeat.

Prayer for the Day

I surrender. I can’t drink and use other drugs. I’m different. Higher Power, help me surrender daily.

Action for the Day
Every so often, I need to admit defeat and talk about what it was like, what happened, and where I am now.

Copyright © 1988 by Hazelden Foundation

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JUST FOR TODAY #essentialsofrec #Na #Recovery #Surrender

Surrender to Win

“Help for addicts begins only when we are able to admit complete defeat.”

~ Basic Text, p. 22 

Complete defeat-what a concept! That must mean surrender. Surrender-to give up absolutely. To quit with no reservations. To put up our hands and quit fighting. Maybe to put up our hand at our first meeting and admit we’re addicts.

How do we know we’ve taken a First Step that will allow us to live drug-free? We know because, once we have taken that gigantic step, we never have to use again-just for today. That’s it. It’s not easy, but it’s very simple.

We work the First Step. We accept that, yes, we are addicts. “One is too many, and a thousand never enough.” We’ve proven that to ourselves enough times. We admit that we cannot handle drugs in any form. We admit it; we say it out loud, if necessary.

We take the First Step at the beginning of our day. For one day. This admission frees us, just for today, from the need to live out our addiction all over again. We’ve surrendered to this disease. We give up. We quit. But in quitting, we win. And that’s the paradox of the First Step: We surrender to win, and by surrendering we gain a far greater power than we ever imagined possible.

Just for today: I admit that I am powerless over my addiction. I will surrender to win.

© 1991 by Narcotics Anonymous World Services Inc

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Daily Reflections #essentialsofrec #Victory #Surrender

 6
January

THE VICTORY OF SURRENDER


We perceive that only through utter defeat are we able to take our first steps toward liberation and strength. Our admissions of personal powerlessness finally turn out to be firm bedrock upon which happy and purposeful lives may be built.

TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 21

When alcohol influenced every facet of my life, when bottles became the symbol of all my self-indulgence and permissiveness, when I came to realize that, by myself, I could do nothing to overcome the power of alcohol, I realized I had no recourse except surrender. In surrender I found victory – victory over my selfish self-indulgence, victory over my stubborn resistance to life as it was given to me. When I stopped fighting anybody or anything, I started on the path to sobriety, serenity and peace.

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TWENTY-FOUR HOURS A DAY #essentialsofrec #AA #Defeated

A.A. Thought for the Day

Have I ceased being inwardly defeated, at war with myself? Have I given myself freely to A. A. and to the Higher Power? Have I gotten over being sick inside? Am I still wandering mentally or am I “on the beam”? I can face anything if I am sure I am on the way. When I am sure, I should bet my life on A.A. I have learned how the program works. Now will I follow it with all I have, with all I can give, with all my might, with all my life? Am I going to let A. A. principles guide the rest of my life?

Meditation for the Day

In this time of quiet meditation, follow the pressure of the Lord’s leading. In all decisions to be made today, yield to the gentle pressure of your conscience. Stay or go as that pressure indicates. Take the events of today as part of God’s planning and ordering. He may lead you to a right decision. Wait quietly until you have an inner urge, a leading, a feeling that a thing is right, a pressure on your will by the spirit of God.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that today I may try to follow the inner pressure of God’s leading. I pray that I may try to follow my conscience and do what seems right today.

© 1954, 1975, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation

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Daily Reflections #essentialsofrec #recovery #defeat

19
October 

A. A.’S “MAIN TAPROOT”


The principle that we shall find no enduring strength until we first admit complete defeat is the main taproot from which our whole Society has sprung and flowered.

TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, pp. 21-22

Defeated, and knowing it, I arrived at the doors of A.A., alone and afraid of the unknown. A power outside of myself had picked me up off my bed, guided me to the phone book, then to the bus stop, and through the doors of Alcoholics Anonymous. Once inside A.A. I experienced a sense of being loved and accepted, something I had not felt since early childhood. May I never lose the sense of wonder I experienced on that first evening with A.A., the greatest event of my entire life.

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Today’s Gift from Hazelden #essentialsofrec #Defeat #Victory

30
August

Defeat may serve as well as victory
To shake the soul and let the glory out.

— Edwin Markham

So life has given us some dents. So what? Dents are necessary, besides being unavoidable and painful. Each dent is a part of the process that enables us to embrace life as a creative experience and to see the world in a new way, a way of compassion and understanding. Recovery is not a matter of escaping further blows or of disguising the dents we already have. It’s a matter of understanding what the dents mean and how we can work with them.

Dents are neither soft spots in our characters that should make us ashamed nor saber scars that should make us proud. They are simply evidence that we have been alive for a while. Recovery offers us the chance to learn from our dents, to accept them as new spaces for growth. When we decide to see our dents as opportunities gained rather than opportunities lost, we stand much taller in our own eyes and in the eyes of others.

Today, I will look on my difficult life experiences in a new light. Today, I will plant some seeds.

From the book:

Days of Healing, Days of Joy by Earnie Larsen and Carol Larsen Hegarty

Days of Healing, Days of Joy by Earnie Larsen and Carol Larsen Hegarty. © 1987, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation

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19
June

“A.A. REGENERATION”

Such is the paradox of A.A. regeneration: strength arising out of complete defeat and weakness, the loss of one’s old life as a condition for finding a new one.

 A.A. COMES OF AGE, p. 46

A thousand beatings by Barleycorn did not encourage me to admit defeat. I believed it was my moral obligation to conquer my “enemy-friend.” At my first A.A. meeting I was blessed with a feeling that it was all right to admit defeat to a disease which had nothing to do with my “moral fiber.” I knew instinctively that I was in the presence of a great love when I entered the doors of A.A. With no effort on my part, I became aware that to love myself was good and right, as God had intended. My feeling set me free, where my thoughts had held me in bondage. I am grateful.

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The Eye Opener #essentialsofrec #Recovery #Strength #Pain #Struggle

29
May

Life has been hard on us, but most of it was made hard by ourselves. The hard life, however, taught us much: it strengthened our muscles; it broadened our experiences. We are better men because of it. We have known much of hunger, pain, defeat, mental anguish, despair and shame. Only the good survived this ordeal, and we can alleviate the sufferings of the world all the better because we have suffered also.

God was not punishing us …He was conditioning us.

Copyright Hazelden Foundation

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day #essentialsofrec #Recovery #Defeat

28
May 

A.A. Thought For The Day
In A.A. we learn that since we are alcoholics we can be uniquely useful people. That is, we can help other alcoholics when perhaps somebody who has not had our experience with drinking could not help them. That makes us uniquely useful. The A.A.s are a unique group of people because they have taken their own greatest defeat and failure and sickness and used it as a means of helping others. We who have been through the same thing are the ones who can best help other alcoholics. Do I believe that I can be uniquely useful?

Meditation For The Day

I should try to practice the presence of God. I can feel that He is with me and near me, protecting and strengthening me always. In spite of every difficulty, every trial, every failure, the presence of God suffices. Just to believe that He is near me brings strength and peace. I should try to live as though God were beside me. I cannot see Him because I was not made with the ability to see Him else there were no room for faith. But I can feel His spirit with me.

Prayer For The Day

I pray that I may try to practice the presence of God. I pray that by doing so I may never feel alone or helpless again.

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